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Things I don’t like that I’m pretty sure Jayne Cortez would be okay with me not liking.

June 3, 2010 \pm\30 2:08 pm

Recently(ish) I comprised a list of things I love that Jayne Cortez would hate.

I admire Jayne Cortez. Jayne Cortez is the O.G. But I gleefully engage on a regular basis in behavior she would likely deem toxic, anti-feminist, corporate poo poo.

In retrospect, maybe I’ve sold myself a little short.

So here is a list of things I don’t like that I’m pretty sure Jayne Cortez would be okay with me not liking:

1. Adjectives. They’re running rampant. Let’s put the clampdown.

2. When I comment on someone else’s thingy on facebook and later I get an email from facebook and I think someone is making a comment about me and get excited (I’m popular! ) but really it’s another person making a comment about the thingy I made a comment on. Hate that.

3. People who haven’t bought my book.

4. Hard fruit.

5. Johnny Damon went away.

6. Bangs. Want ’em. Can’t have ’em (JAfro = Joey Ramone effect). So none of you should get to have ’em either.

7. Brooklyn children. (Jayne hope you’re okay with that).

8. Their parents. (Jayne I think you know why).

9. When people say: “I love Paris.” Shush. We all do.

10. People who don’t follow me on Twitter. Dude. What’s up with that?

10a. And while we’re at it, I don’t like this Follow Friday business. What? This is how your Follow Friday looks on my end:

@@@#$^%$&^(* @@@@@84937@@@@@hrnthn;03-2u90@@@@@425235@@%@^&Gant;nw34@@@#WW%#&$#(@25uo@@gkpo@@@

Yes, like a baby sat on the keyboard.

11. Mick Jagger is old.

12. Hipsters watching me eat.

Special bonus item: Selling my soul for this damn blog.

One Comment
  1. zlatan permalink
    June 4, 2010 \am\30 3:31 am 3:31 am


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