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We who are about to tweet: @rgay.

July 4, 2011 \pm\31 5:57 pm

[In which we find out the Twitter philosophies of my most beloved follows. ♥ Also guys: Roxane’s new book, Ayiti, is available for pre-order today from Artistically Declined.]

Twitter username: @rgay
Real name: Roxane (with one N) Gay
Recent memorable tweet: “I Dr. Googled this. She’s Lil Wayne’s ex-wife. That’s amazing. She got a TV show for once being married to a guy. Respect.”

How often do you tweet? Do you limit yourself to a number of tweets per day, or to a certain time of day? Any other OCD-like tweeting tendencies?

I tweet mostly every day. I have absolutely no tweet management tendencies. Sadly, if a ridiculous thought pops into my head that makes me giggle, I will post it to Twitter.

What is your ‘follow’ philosophy? Do you follow everyone who follows you? Do you follow celebrities, lit mags, ex-boyfriends?

I follow almost everyone who follows me unless I don’t like them in which case I do not because that would be weird and I don’t understand why they want to follow me, for that matter. I do follow celebrities. It’s a wild assortment with a depressing number of celebrities who tweet inspirational twaddle. I hate knowing they’re that fake positive. Once in a while, I wish a celebrity would say something interesting but not, Mental Illness interesting because that is only fun to watch for the first few minutes. I do follow litmags though most litmags have no idea what they’re doing on Twitter and never update their feeds so it’s mostly a gesture of support. I do not believe in merging social networking and ex-boyfriends or current boyfriends. That never ends well and I am pretty ridiculous when it comes to relationship pettiness and jealousy so it’s for the best. This surprises people about me but there are some things I keep grounded in real life and offline. I do follow a couple guys I have had brief encounters of the adult kind with but with whom I wasn’t so attached that I would be irritated to see them happy.

What is your @ philosophy? Do you tweet people back, engage in ‘chit chat,’ become annoyed when others do?

I do not have a @philosophy. Is this a thing? At times I do engage in conversations, particularly with people I am friends with in RL. I am quite certain this can be irritating for others to witness. Inside jokes are only amusing if you are on the inside. Sorry.

What is your #hashtag philosophy?

Is this a thing too? I don’t use hashtags too often. Hashtags feel too smug and I want to punch them in the face.

Do you obsess about number of: followers / retweets / favorites / unfollows / other?

Not really. Sometimes, I am sad about how I seem to lose followers once in a while (HATERS) but I am only sad about this when I accept a new Follow Request and notice the number of followers and how it may have fluctuated. This is complicated by the fact that I rarely remember how many followers I had previously so sometimes I am just sad because I MAYBE lost followers but cannot be sure. Oh dear. This is all so complicated and fraught.

How do you think you come across to your followers? How would you like to come across?

I think I come across as weird and funny and sort of obsessive about random pop culture things. One day I spent about an hour tweeting information about the Pine Sol Lady. I want to come across as weird and funny and sort of obsessive about random pop culture things.

What do you want people to remember about your Twitter account?

I don’t want people to remember a damn thing about my Twitter account. I’d much prefer they remember me, or my decolletage.

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